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I can’t keep an erection for more than a few minutes – I feel like a failure

SOFT SPOT

DEAR DEIDRE: I CAN’T keep an erection for more than a few minutes and am beginning to feel like a failure.

It’s been a problem since I got together with my girlfriend three months ago. 

I’m 30 and she’s 24. 

Ever since the moment we met, I have been  besotted with her. She truly is the woman of my dreams and sometimes I can’t wrap my head around the fact she chose me.

Everything has been perfect, but the problem is I’m struggling to satisfy her in the bedroom.

I’ve never had any issues before, but every time we have sex I go soft.

She’s been so understanding, but I can’t help but feel I’m letting her down. I’m consumed with anxiety

What if she decides to leave me?

Get in touch with the Dear Deidre team

Every problem gets a personal reply from one of our trained counsellors.

Fill out and submit our easy-to-use and confidential form and the Dear Deidre team will get back to you.

You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.

DEIDRE SAYS: Your problem is psychological. Anxiety is perhaps blocking your sexual responses, so the first step is to share those fears with your girlfriend.

By talking about your concerns, the level of trust and the sense of connection will improve. This should ease the pressure you feel and help your responses return to normal. 

For more advice and help, read my support pack, Solving Erection Problems.